People go on about broken families and what it does to children and how they are 'scarred for life'. Of course the people that say these things are usually from a solid family where the parents are still together and they have had no problems in their lives (in no way am I saying that this is a bad thing). But, well I say that maybe some 'broken' families are better than 'perfect' families.
I consider myself extremely lucky to benefit from all of the people that I consider to be family around me. Without those terrible breaks that feel so bad at the time of them happening the people that are in my life now wouldn't be around. I guess that's what life is about.
My parents split up before I was born but without that happening I wouldnt have 'Nanny Purple' in my life or my brother.
My fiance Tim died 5 months after my son Jacob was born.... this of course was THE most difficult thing for me to deal with and, well, maybe you dont deal with these things but I have learnt to cope and it has been these family and extended families that have helped me get through all of that. And the person I am today is because of these people around me.
Tim's parents also were seperated and so again there was a mother, father and step-mother along with his sister, brother and since he died sister in law and nephew. All of these people have played a massive role in our lives. See, love doesnt have to be shared, you just seem to acquire more room for more people and if you make the room for them then they have usually made room for you somewhere too. I have tried to explain this to Jacob on a number of occasions and I think he understands where Im coming from now.
Then, of course I was incredibly lucky to have met Richard.... Richard has made me happier than I ever could have imagined feeling after everything that we went through when we lost Tim. I believed I had had my happiness and that I would live the rest of my life alone. Richard has made me see life in a whole new light again. He has made me a stronger, happier, more confident woman and I cannot imagine now how I ever thought Id get through the rest of my life without him being part of it.
With Richard I obviously also gained two more 'in-laws', although none of these 'in-laws' are official. ...Maybe thats a good thing because i definitely dont have that traditional (oh god its the bloody in-laws) relationship with any of them, (Richard's or Tim's parents). All of this extended family I have now, they are all just lovely people that I am truly happy to consider my family.
Of course this post appears to miss out my REAL family... you know BLOOD relatives but they are the people that have to put up with me no matter what (sorry guys). They are no less appreciated than these marvellous additions.
So, I guess what Im trying to say is I consider my three children to be very lucky to be part of this 'broken' family. More people to love, more people to care and of course more people to babysit :)
